question
Is it better for two people that are going to be madly in love with each...can't get enough of each other...etc etc
or is it better for two people to be friends, love each other but not crazily, and be there to support each other?
What does each choice mean?
8 Comments:
why must it be a world of extremes, why can't it be both
yeah this is a confusing post.
i think a lot of times, a couple that is "madly in love with each other" isn't so much in love, but rather caught up in a state of heightened passion and lust. this tends to subside after a while, hence, our high divorce rates.
I agree, Alvin -- I know that Juny often spoke of an "infatuation" period, when you first meet someone and are totally into them, and that it fades as you get to know them. If it's "true love," then you really never get tired of your "lover." You get to know each other increasing intimacy both physically and mentally, get comfortable w/ each other, and do become best friends. You can better recognize his/her faults once you know him/her better, o' course. But you know it's love when you can treasure and tease those faults away.
There's nothing totally wrong w/ passion and lust. In fact, it's normal to need that in a relationship. The "best" relationship is a combination of those two extremes. Love can be craaaaazy, but you do also have to live your own lives. Perhaps it's a mix of passion and practicality, teasing and trust, sensuality and support. :)
But in the end, don't think too hard about it. Let things happen. It's hard to do, isn't it? We're always trying to provide for the future. But in the future, all we'll have of here-and-now is the memories, so make the best of here and now. ^_^
the passion and lust phase i referred to is that same "infatuation" period. it subsides, and then people interpret it as "loss of the magic" or "no longer in love" when they really weren't in love yet. real love takes time.
I think another question is, "How do you know you're in love?" There are so many different types, and love is different between two different people. I do think that "true love" has a passion and lust phase, but that phase keeps right on going -- it doesn't fade. Instead, time adds more fuel to the fire; that is, friendship, understanding, conversations, being w/ that person, etc all add to the relationship.
aahh boy. oh this IS COOL. all my blogger stuff comes out ENTIRELY IN KOREAN! WHOOOOAH! except then it says stuff like "5 ko-men-tuh-su" but other stuff is translated. woooow.
ok anyway. i'll stop getting off topic. the point is that this seems to be the question du lifetime, eh?
you can argue for either side, but i think ultimately, they're both preeeeetty awesome right? so, like the melvin says... why not both. although... it doesn't always happen that way right? life ain't perfect.
way out your options. :-/
right now, i feel like since we're young, the hot flames kind of rule over sense... maybe we'll all settle when we get older... i mean... that's how it goes, right? in general? you find the steadfast, responsible love... not necessarily the passionate one...
but you can't project into the future. we're all so young. we need to experience them all firsthand before knowing what's right for us, yeah? so...
yeah. my two cents.
hmm sometimes children herald in that disappointment phase, i think..
children could force maturity upon a couple, but aren't a prerequisite, or a necessity. it'd be nice if people could just be mature about relationships to start with, but where's the fun in that, eh?
update biatch
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